Oh thank you Britney, for providing me both a giggle and something else to procrastinate with. My god, with the money she makes, can't she afford a decent copywriter?
From the Britney Spears website:
STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESSMarch 30, 2005
Dear False Tabloids,
As you read this letter, I bet you are asking yourself: Who? Who, me? Am I a false tabloid? Well, I don't know. But after this posting, I hope you are asking yourself a lot of questions. Your employees are a reflection of your magazine. Do you, Us Weekly, In Touch, Star and other desperate magazines want employees who are honest, or those who are liars? It seems to me that you'd prefer the latter. I'm really concerned about the people you hire to work at your companies. I'd like them to ask themselves the question, "What am I lying to myself about?" Is it that you are 50 pounds overweight? Is it that your children aren't making wise decisions? Or is it maybe that your husband or boyfriend is cheating on you? Until you face what is going on in your life, I guess you'll remain a false tabloid.
Britney
P.S. People Magazine is great in my book!
As I read this letter, I am asking myself: who, me? Am I a false tabloid? What's a REAL tabloid, anyway? People? Also, what in the hell is she talking about? Are FALSE TABLOID writers all women who are fifty pounds overweight with drug-addicted children and cheating husbands? Or perhaps she's employing some clever literary technique by anthropomorphizing the tabloids?
I wonder how long it will take for reproducing with Kevin Federline to not look like such a "wise decision."
Ah, blogs. Empowering celebrities to sound as idiotic as the rest of us.