knowitallgirl

Outta here!

This time as I go on vacation I'll tell my blog readers so I don't get the emails I got last time when a few good friends of mine began to wonder if I had disappeared from the planet. I'll be gone this week exploring the wonder that is Lake Tahoe -- no online access! Woo-hoo! :)

Scanning Fun

I decided to scan a few old black & white negatives tonight to see how well they'd come out. Here's a sample.

Yes, I shall conquer the world! Just gimme twenty years . . .

There's no excuse for nose hair. Ever!

. . . says my favorite queer guy Kyan. I couldn't agree more.

Mismatch

Suiting Up With the New Woman Warrior, in today's New York Times, mentions the book "Mismatch" by Andrew Hacker (the first I've heard of this book), which posits an interesting theory -- "American women were now outpacing men educationally, professionally, emotionally and soon perhaps athletically to an extent that could imperil human happiness." After introducing Deneb last night to Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, I'm wondering -- is this a sign that the scales are tipping? Are these advancements by women finally forcing straight men to play by our rules? I'm thinking the happiness they might be referring to in the quote is that of straight men. (I also just trolled a few reviews of "Mismatch" and it doesn't look like it was well-received.)

Also: per yesterday's post, The OC totally sucks, dude. More on that later.

Like, dude.

Ok, sometimes I regret that I watch so little TV, because then I miss out on cultural landmarks like The O.C., which I'll get to watch tonight for the first time. I learned about it this past weekend when Deneb and I had Sylvan and Sylvia over to our new pad Friday night to watch the Giants game. Sylvan mentioned that he invited his young cousin to stop by, who was starting his first semester in college this week. The cousin showed up with a new dormmate in tow, a blond, sunburnt dude name Randall who after a few moments I was sure hailed from OC, specifically Corona del Mar. (I was wrong -- he was from Newport Beach, even better given the locale of The OC). I guessed this not only from his appearance but from the slow, stony SoCal accent I know so well, which I often find emanating from my own throat. Dude, whatever.

Anyway, I got quite a kick out of Randall (he told me about the show), who was such a Newport-OC dude he was almost a caricature of himself (but very nice, I must say), down to the BMW X5 he drives (I'll forgive him for not giving what I suspect was the real reason why he drove a $50K SUV, which I'm sure is because mom and dad bought it for him, not a surprise for a *typical* Newport kid). And I was delighted to hear about The O.C., brought to us by the creator of 90210 and Melrose Place, so you know it's gotta be good and trashy, even though I can't imagine OC as much of a place to stage a show (somehow, I doubt they're going to skewer OC's odd elite, a strange mix of wealth plus arch-conservatism in any manner that would make the show worth watching. Why didn't they pick West LA if they needed superficial rich people?).

But the absolute clincher for me was a review of the first episode I stumbled across yesterday in The New Yorker, which, in describing the cast, noted that one character hailed from "downscale Riverside" (my hometown!), which she "worked hard to forget". This fills me with a mix of shame (it's ok when I make fun of Riverside, but not anyone else!) and a sense of being oddly understood -- I'm not the only one to recognize the place for what it is! But does this mean that far more people will nod and smirk when I admit where I'm from? Have I been outed? I'm conflicted.

Anyway, for all of you who've never *experienced* the strangeness and shallowness that is OC, I'll be sure to give an authentication report afterwards. ;)

MoveOn.org 1, Clear Channel 0

Well, well. After thousands of comments by the American public vociferously rejecting the recommendations made by the F.C.C., Michael Powell is being forced to respond to the public by having a task force attempt to justify how consolidating corporate control of the media improves local control. It's great to see that mass public action works (all thanks to MoveOn.org), and it will be very interesting to see the outcome of this task force (I'm sure hand-picked by Mr. Powell, probably including representatives of Clear Channel). It might be nothing but greenwashing, but his hand is being forced. That's something.

Hijacking Democracy in Texas

And conventional wisdom calls Californians loopy. What is it with the biggest states in the US? Read what's going on with the redistricting fight in Texas, compliments of Moveon.org. This is INSANE, and in my mind trumps the idiocy here in CA.

Do not overthink this.

Without a doubt, the kindest legal notice I've ever seen. Also, if you are a TMBG fan, download the clock radio -- it's got dat fancy FLASH stuff in it, which keeps Deneb verrrry busy.

OUR VERY FIRST LEGAL DISCLAIMER
In light of recent events, we here at tmbg.com want to remind everyone that They Might Be Giants offer the TMBG Clock Radio and free Mp3s to their audience out of respect and love for their support. Please do not take their stuff and disseminate it in ways that will only crush their spirit of generosity. Do not feel compelled to overthink this. Enjoy the music in the spirit and the form it was given. It's a gift to you-not content to be exploited.
Sincerely-the staff of tmbg.com.

Credit for orgies?

I can assure you that this sort of thing didn't happen at stodgy UC Irvine (another reason why Irvine sucks), but boy did I wish it had. Another reason why Cal is the coolest UC school.

Train mania?

There's got to be a word for an obsession with trains. If anyone knows it, please tell me.

I've been noticing every evening when I pull into the Mountain View Caltrain station that an older gentleman (I'll call him Harvey) is always sitting in a lawn chair under a tree near the tracks. I figured he must be there everyday as I'd noticed the chair in the mornings when he wasn't around, but I figured he must be waiting for someone to come home in the evenings. After watching him in action yesterday, I'd say Harvey is train obsessed.

I have no idea when he arrives, but he's always there around 6pm, and he appears to enjoy watching the trains go by. Personally, I love watching the express trains fly by -- when the morning northbound express thunders through Millbrae at around 7:48 each morning, it's got to be going about sixty or seventy miles per hour, and it's mesmerizing -- from San Jose, they travel in reverse, so the rear of the train appears to creep towards you until suddenly it's close enough for you to realize it's hauling ass. Like a flash of lightening, it's blasting past you, kicking up newspapers and bags around the tracks, and just as quickly it's gone, the engine pushing the train up the tracks towards San Fran, growing smaller and smaller by the second.

Harvey does more than watch, though -- he's apparently nominated himself to be the honorary conductor of Mountain View, standing at the end of the platform, alternating between constant waving and gestures indicating to the engineer where to stop the train. Next, he transitions into waving mixed with signals letting the engineer know that the passengers are out of the way. Then it’s back to constant waving, which the engineer intermittently returns. All the while, Harvey’s just beaming, looking as happy as can be. As soon as the train pulled away, Harvey returned to his chair beneath the tree to wait for the next southbound train.

Next time, I think I’ll talk to him, and ask him what this is all about.

Guess what?

I just have to broadcast to the world that I have the BEST DAMN BOYFRIEND IN THE UNIVERSE. Deneb, you are the best. :)

Search engine?

I've been biking to work this summer, a four or so mile trek from the Mountain View Caltrain station to Sunnyvale. I shortcut through Lockheed Martin -- yes, I have security clearance -- where the gates are manned 24/7 to keep the terrorists out. In order to get through, I have to show them my Yahoo ID, which always gets a reaction out of them (I guess government contractors aren't the most exciting bunch of folks).

"Yahoo. Ya-hooooooooooooo! Yahhhhhhooooooooooooooooo. Hey, that's where they got that search engine, right? There's a search engine there?"

I hesitated, not wanting to get into the particulars of what a server farm was, when suddenly the guard's question evoked an image in my mind of a huge, creaking machine, greasy gears churning, chewing through a zillion little slips of paper a second as people made search requests. A Willy Wonka type job with big smokestacks. I smiled.

"Kinda," I answered. Why spoil the fun?

I Am Pizza

I've been doing a ton of painting lately, as Deneb and I consolidate households at our primo new Dolores Park apt. Deneb's place alone took 5 coats on each wall to mask the creative colors he adorned his apartment with (as he is quick to point out, the new occupants have no taste). I've taken to writing messages on the walls, just in case someone decides to x-ray them one day, so they'll get a fun surprise (I think of it as tagging for the law abiding). My reoccurring theme is around pizza, since when I was a wee lass growing up in Riverslime, my best friend Allie's house had a block wall facing a busy street. On that wall someone had spray painted (in the days before "East Side Riva" or other gang-related tagging) "Gino Loves Pizza." It was up for years (and strangely, attracted no other graffiti), and I always used to wonder who Gino was and what kind of pizza he loved (Greasy Straw Hat from the Canyon Crest Town Center, where it was rumored the teenaged employees spit in the pizza? Perennially plastic Pizza Hut, perched next to the train tracks and always an exciting place to be when the trains passed?). To keep up the tradition, I keep tagging the walls as I paint, hoping to confuse some earnest archaeologist in some distant future.

Cheetos of Mass Destruction

Interesting how while we look for terrorists beneath every bush, and assail foreigners for conspiring to attack our allmighty country, what appears to be having the most effect in weakening our country is our appalling diet. Soon, we're going to be the World's Greatest Superpower simply by our ability to crush our foes beneath our exceedingly ample asses. We have access to the best food and health care in the world, and we're killing ourselves by eating Cheetos and Ding Dongs. I think the terrorists are starting to look a lot like Dolly Madison and Betty Crocker.

Democracy in the Middle East?

Here's an alternative view to the spread of democracy in the Middle East from Essential.org, in contrast to the Administration's pledge yesterday by Ms. Rice. I like how "free markets" and "democracy" always have to be joined. What if the Iraqi people, for example, want a democratic socialist government where all of the country's oil resources and services were 100% state owned and operated? How committed will we remain to their sovereignty when our oil companies won't get a piece of the action?

Terminate Davis?

After reading this article in the Chronicle today, one could almost think that Ahnold could do some good by shaking up the status quo. Of course my friend Vikki, a former Minnesotian, is quick to caution us after the Ventura administration (the best Jesse schwag I ever saw were postcards that said "My governor can beat up your governor."), where she had several friends who voted Ventura in a fit of frustration and later lived to regret it. I am frightened by the presence of the Reagan bust in Ahnold's office, and hope it's an aspirational example for other actors and not a result of Reagan's politics (now I'm engaging in wishful thinking). Yesterday the Dems apparently decided Gray was officially toast and starting throwing some serious contenders into the mix. As much as I'm interested in this entire debacle (much like watching a train wreck), I’m still incensed that it’s putting the state deeper into the red. I suppose one of these ultra-rich candidates could step up to the plate and offer to pay for the recall cost. That would at least show a modicum of responsibility for this mess.

Moms know best

I'm often told by friends that I'm the healthiest eater they know, which I consider a compliment. In 1995 I spent five months living in a VW bus travelling across the country with a man who fashioned himself a vegetarian epicure. At that time I had stopped eating meat but my diet consisted of cheese, tofu, bread, and the occasional salad. That summer I lived without a refrigerator, ate every single meal in the bus (except for one stop in Ithaca, NY at the Moosewood Restaurant, a vegetarian's nirvana), and learned how to cook vegetables. I've never looked back, and since then have also devoted myself to becoming a vegetarian gourmand.

I did begin eating meat again starting about two years ago due to a continual cycle of getting ill about every six weeks with a cold or flu, but I still only eat it about two times per week, and also started eating fish, which I'd never liked before. However, I've still considered myself a healthy eater, and try to eat at least one meal a day that's entirely plant based (or at least with a minimum of carbohydrates). I cut my bread/pasta consumption down to almost nil over a year ago, which had helped me keep off an extra five pounds that continually plagued me. I avoid fast food at all costs (with a once-every-six-month breakdown for In-N-Out), most sweets, all sodas, and most fried foods. I drink soymilk, not animal milk, but still have major weaknesses for cheese, ice cream, and yogurt.

Anyway, I'm telling you all of this because my Mom sent me a book on Monday called "Eat To Live," by Dr. Joel Furhman, which I must admit I was originally a bit skeptical about because, as mentioned before, I tend to be the healthiest eater I know (yes, I'm such a knowitall). But I figured I'd skim it and see what I could find out. I don't believe in dieting or fad diets (I still can't tell you the difference between Atkins, the Zone, or Ornish) and would always be happier losing ten pounds, but not obsessing about it.

All the weight loss hype aside (hey, most people don't pick up a book to learn how to eat healthier unless they've got a problem, so I understand the motivation), it's a god damned good book. It backs up much of what I know via the hippie/new age vegetarian health movements with sound science. It does a good job of debunking fad diets and other food myths, as well as opening the door for other points of view for healthy eating besides the author's own. I've never in my life recommended a book like this to anyone (besides cookbooks) but I'd like to recommend it to all of you, with the wish that you all avoid disease by learning to eat better. (And if you want further evidence of why you shouldn't let corporations tell you how to eat, read Fast Food Nation and Beyond Beef.)

After reading this book, this healthy eater is going to make some changes of her own, including reducing my dairy intake, aggressively avoiding refined sugar and flour, and reintroducing carbs back into my diet but only as whole grains. I'll let you know what happens. ;)

Leafy green trends

First, congrats to Jen Vineyard -- AP picked up her story on Britney this fine morning (she's the "MTV" alluded to in the piece).

Next, little did I know that I was part of a "new trend in salad," according to NPR this morning. Mache (pronounced "mash"), or lamb's lettuce, promises to be the arugula of the 00's. Move over, spring mix!

Feel like funkin' it up?

Caught the Rebirth Brass Band on Saturday during the North Beach Jazz Festival (as the organizers mentioned, "This is YOUR jazz festival! Not Starbucks', not Wal-Mart's!), and they were HOT. Funky, groovy jazz, though maybe a few too many covers and not enough traditional New Orleans style stuff. Regardless, it was free and it was awesome. Me thinks I am a fool for not having gone to Jazz Fest in NOLA yet.

Gay parents = violence against children?

Here's a good response to the Catholic Church's recent rant about the evils posed by legitimizing same-sex marriage and the so-called violence it does to children of those partnerships. As pas notes, how many people do you know who have been raised by heterosexual parents in repulsively violent, sick families? And those families only due to the gender orientation of the parents should always take precedence over same-sex parents? SCREW THAT.

The Western world is in an interesting transition between old world moral obligations and a future where people choose their families and other personal associations not based upon forced traditions but upon, I hope, love. While the West has abandoned arranged marriages, for instance, we still have a narrow definition of what acceptable families should look like.

A world based upon love relationships threatens the power structure of the old world where family and clan power defined how the world operated (this isn't the past yet, if you consider the ever-growing Bush dynasty). Freedom to choose who you want to love is a natural outgrowth of democracy. With the scandals rocking the Catholic Church as of late, I find it unbelievable the Church has a moral leg to stand upon (and the gall to do so). I hope these are the desperate wheezings of a dying old man whose time has come to exit the stage, while the rest of us reject the moral precepts of the past and forge a future recognizing that love is a far better compass than any rules humans can create.

24 hours on Craigslist?

Craigslist the movie? Hmmmmm.

You are what you elect

I'm a firm believer that we as a nation tend to get the political leadership we deserve for being a nation of apathetic, non-voting losers. The idiotic California recall effort is a prime example, with the candidate pool quickly growing to resemble a circus. We're all still waiting to see if Ah-nold will toss in his hat (why oh why do we think actors can solve our problems?), but now we have a true alternative: Larry Flynt. At this point, I might even be tempted to vote Flynt if only because he's an unabashed leftist and isn't bought and sold by any other interests besides porn.

As a lifelong Californian who usually appreciates Californian kookiness, this recall effort is beyond stupid. For fuck's sake people, say what you want about Gov. Gray (and I am not a fan), but use some modicum of your brain power to realize that the underpinnings of our current financial hell were put soundly in place by former Republican Governor Pete Wilson and his team of energy deregulation cronies. Without the ridiculous amount of money we allowed to be funneled out of this state in that debacle, even with the current recession we would not be in the dire straits we are in today. I'm not going to defend the current leadership as admirable, but to blame Gray for this mess is idiotic. We should be directing our anger at the corporate greed that lined the pockets of the energy companies and have left our public infrastructure in the worst financial condition I've seen in my thirty years. Our nation is being raped by an ultra-rich class of robber barons, and as long as we all continue to just stand by and let this happen we're all complicit.

Personally, I thank California's last contribution to the Republican leadership, Reagan, for opening the door to this new era of greed with the deregulation of the savings and loan industry in the 1980s. We've been sucking money out of the public coffers to enrich the already rich ever since. (Of course, history only repeats itself; anyone remember Teapot Dome?)

Addendum: Ok, I thought about this more over lunch. Maybe a change in attitude is in order. After all, if we're going to completely screw with our political system, maybe we should do it in grandiose style. If this is what we moronic Californians want, then by god, let's go all the way. Let's elect the stupidest actor we can possibly find and have them play the part. Let's install the porn king. Hell, let's elect a hamster. Keep tabs on the potential candidates here.