knowitallgirl

Oh, and here are some

Oh, and here are some photos from the big event (scroll down to the next post to read all about it):

Crossing the finish line!

Massage time . . .

Here's the view out the front door, Napili cove (above & below).

I am a giant ball

I am a giant ball of pain, but I did it. I am an official Marathoner. I finished 177th in my division, and 1737th overall out of 1793 (total time: 7:47:41) Here’s how it happened.

Last night was the Team In Training pasta party and general “go get ‘em” session, where I gorged myself on carbs and listened to some decently inspirational speeches (TNT is surprisingly low on corniness, which is surprising considering how rah-rah they are). I think it helped that we were on the Sheraton Kaanapali’s ocean lawn, so I had the sunset to entertain me. On my way back to the condo, I witnessed one of the most beautiful full moon rises I’ve ever seen in Hawaii. It was utterly spectacular. I took a few pics that I’m sure won’t do it justice. Anyway, I mention this because I had to get up at 2am (the busses left for the starting line at 3:15), and the full moon was my companion until about 6am this morning, where I watched it set over the West Maui mountains just as the sun began cresting the top of Haleakala. There are few things as magnificent as watching a full moon both rise and set in Hawaii.

I had 1.5 hours to hang out and stretch at the starting line, so I made a few observations (and learned a few facts):

• There were over 2200 people in the Marathon today (which means lots of people actually dropped out!)
  
• There were more Japanese than any other nationality (there were HUGE Japanese running clubs present)
  
• The Japanese are very quiet runners (especially when compared to obnoxious Americans)
  
• TNT had over 500 runners in the race – we were a legion of purple tank tops
  
• The runners were from 18 countries and 44 U.S. states (how am I remembering this? No idea.)
  
• Best running group of the day: “Fools For Jesus,” from Colorado.
  

We started at 5:30am sharp to the sound of a conch shell blowing after the traditional Hawaiian chant and blessing. The sky was just growing light gray in the east over Haleakala. I drank so much water and Poweraide even before I began that I had to make use of the cane fields after the first mile. The Marathon was best before the sun rose, when the cars were still scarce (since there’s only one road from central Maui to the west, we had to share it) and the temperature was only seventy-five.

For the first ten miles, I felt great, cocky even. I was taking regular 2-3 minute walk breaks, watching my timing, and feeling on top of it. Of course, I did notice that some of the speed walkers were passing me while I was “running,” but no matter! This wasn’t so bad! I’m going to kick ass! At mile six I passed an aid station staffed by Maui High School kids. I had my name on the front of my tank top so people kept shouting encouragement at me: “Looking good, Jen! Way to go, Jen! You can do it!” There was something so sweet and earnest about these kids (and from my experience teaching Hawaiian teenagers for three years, I can tell you that there can’t be nicer kids anywhere on the planet) that it brought tears to my eyes. Thank the gods I was running in a place full of Aloha Spirit. Everything was perfect.

Then I hit the hill. As you pass Ma’alaea and begin the pali route to Lahaina, you climb a gradual hill, which in this case started around mile ten and lasted until mile twelve. Like most everyone around me, I decided to speed walk the hill to save my energy for the long haul. It was at this point (just like three weeks ago during my eighteen-miler) that my injured left foot began to kick in. I gritted my teeth and tried to ignore it, imagining that once I hit flat ground I’d be fine. Well, I should get the World’s Biggest Moron Award for wearing the same shoes that aggravated my injury during training for my Marathon. By the time I hit the flat at mile twelve, BOTH feet were starting to hurt. Lots. And my cranky right hip was getting super cranky. I walked it out for a bit longer and then tried to run. It was at this point that I realized I was facing two choices – quit, or walk. I felt heartbroken and wimpy, but realized I’d feel much, much worse having to tell everyone I knew that I came all this way and didn’t finish.

So I put myself in my best aggressive speed walking form and went to it. By this time it was after 8am, the sun was climbing fast, and I’d hit the stretch that I’d been dreading for weeks. This part of West Maui gets very little rain and despite the fact that you’re typically no more than 20 feet away from the ocean’s edge at any point in time, it’s incredibly dry and hot along this part, with almost no shade. I began to make liberal use of the iced sponges at the aid stations at this point, shoving one in my hat and in the back of my tank top.

Miles fourteen through eighteen were the very worst. It was at this point that I began to lose my mind. It’s amazing how when you put your body through intense physical stress how quickly you revert back to savagery. I found myself wanting to grunt, bark, bite, growl. People passed me and I hated them intensely, and imagined myself kicking them. I thought about quitting. I made the mistake of consuming a caffeinated Power Gel and started to hallucinate. The sun began to burn. My feet felt as if they were swelling out of my shoes. For some reason, I kept remembering the part in The Stand by Stephen King where one of the characters injures himself on the trek to Vegas and is lost in the wilderness with a broken ankle. As I recall, it begins to develop gangrene and he begins to lose his mind with the pain. I found myself relating well to that story, imagining begging to be shot up with narcotics to end it all. Everything hurt.

Somewhere after eighteen I hit some stretches of shade and that helped me regain my focus. Plus, in addition to the aid stations there were tons of Team In Training outposts, and everyone kept cheering us on. Being forced to smile at my teammates helped to temper my savagery, and my desire to bite and maim began to recede. Then I hit the twenty mark, and I realized I was going to finish this damn thing, and not die in the process. I’m not sure how I was able to do it. I was in serious pain by then, but I hadn’t developed any blisters, which I think would have been my death toll. Plus, I kept “connecting to the cause,” as the TNTers put it. I thought about the pain I was feeling and wondered if it was worse than cancer. And of course, my pain had a discrete end in sight. I was going to be ok once I collapsed. I couldn’t imagine what it would feel like to have your body eating away at itself without respite. Somehow, I felt that putting myself through this must lessen the burden for those who are truly suffering. I have no idea if that’s true, but it’s the only sense I could make of it all.

Did you know that Lahaina means something like “sweltering heat” in Hawaiian? I didn’t until today, and I’ve gotta concur. The last four miles were insanely hot as the route took us through downtown Lahaina, but as I passed my favorite Lahaina landmark (a church with a huge neon sign that says “Jesus Coming Soon,” which I always imagine as “Jesus: Coming Soon To A Theatre Near You!), I could see the big Kaanapali resorts along the coast, and thus the finish line. “Almost . . . over . . . almost . . . over,” said my brain.

My mom (who was waiting for me at the finish line with pizza and a lei) just asked me how it felt to cross the finish line. I think if I could have actually run the last mile and charged across it I would have felt a much greater sense of exhilaration. As it was, I’d surpassed the seven hour mark and could barely walk, so more than anything I felt a sense of total relief. I immediately took advantage of my free ten-minute massage, where I pried my shoes off of my swollen, bruised feet. After hanging out for a bit (and noticing, happily, that even an hour after I finished people were still crossing the finish line), we returned to the condo where I took an ice bath and passed out.

And that’s it. I survived, with a nasty sunburn and some pretty screwed up feet. Curious to see how I feel tomorrow morning. After regaining consciousness, I sat outside and watched the sunset while the sea turtles bobbed around Napili cove. I’ve already begun to ask myself – would I do this again? Right now, I don’t feel much like a Marathoner. I feel like I endured a very long walk. I feel like a crappy-ass runner. But I do like that a ten-mile run now seems like a piece of cake. I can honestly say that physically, this was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life.

And now, off to bed.

Hewwo friends, it's true, I'm

Hewwo friends, it's true, I'm in paradise. I write you from Napili on the fine island of Maui, where I sit not more than 25 feet away from the ocean's edge. I can hear the waves crashing from inside the condo, which has to be the best sound on the planet. As soon as we got here today (I'm with my Mom and her boyfriend) I jumped into Napili cove, which just so happens to be some of the very best snorkeling on Maui. Excellent visibility, even at 3pm, immediately saw four turtles and a big fish with purple spots that I've never seen before. That's truly one of the magical things about this place -- almost without exception, everytime I go snorkeling I see a new fish. Amazing.

And despite four years of trying and failing, this time I succeeded in landing myself here during a perfect full moon without even realizing it. In fact, I'm going to drag myself outside for my ritual full moon swim (except not naked this time, sad). Even at 10pm it's about 80 and perfect outside. Despite the bright moon (which illuminates the water and the other islands perfectly) you can still see stars. Paradise. And, in another kind trick of fate, my friend Aniko is a four minute walk from this condo, so she stopped by and we took in a swim before sunset. More perfection.

I am seriously having the "why in the hell did I ever leave" thoughts tonight. I do like Hawaii Jen better than SF Jen -- she's far, far more relaxed. Why do I have ambition? Why can't I just be happy working some stupid service job and spending all my free time snorkeling, surfing, hiking, kayaking, canoeing, etc.? Argh. Time to think about that again.

Ok, full moon and ocean await. Aloha to you all! A hui ho!

So, tomorrow is the day

So, tomorrow is the day I leave for Maui. Yes, I am finally getting excited. Thank you all for the phone calls and emails wishing me luck. I haven’t exercised nearly at all for the past two weeks, with the exception of stretches and some floor exercises to heal my foot. With all the stress of the new job, school, and moving plans (I’m staying in SF), I’ve got a ton of energy to burn off.

I’m ready, though. Marathoning has brought me to a new level of consciousness in my body, and for the first time in my life I actually feel like an athlete. I also feel much more aware of this thing I live in each day of my life, more connected to what I do to it and how it responds in turn. With my training I’ve become quite the meat-eater these past few months, and I’m shocked at what a difference that’s making in my energy levels. But I can’t quite imagine eating it every day – that feels like overindulgence.

Anyway, I’ve been so busy with all this new stuff I haven’t even read the paper in two weeks, so I have no idea what’s going on in the world. Except I know that I’ll be in the Chronicle tomorrow, expressing my opinion about equal pay (I was in a few months ago talking about drugs, but you’ll have to search to find that one). And check my page while I’m gone – I’m bringing the damn laptop, and plan to post photos after the race, dial-up connection permitting.

I also did something random today I've been wanting to do for some time: I joined The Commonwealth Club, to encourage myself to get out there and participate more in public forums. They got some cool stuff going on -- in fact, I'm missing Al Gore speak next week, and if any of you ever wanna check something out, bug me! I'm on a total kick right now (especially with the marathon wrapping up) to find more fun things to do in the world. I'm trying to find like-minded souls who want to go hiking or biking around here. But it's difficult to find people who aren't either totally macho or into EXTREME sports. Aren't there any moderates out there? Plus, I want to learn how to play soccer. And hang glide, but I don't think I can schedule that one in quite yet. Ok, face it, I want to do EVERYTHING!

Ok, so, let me do

Ok, so, let me do some catching up here. First, a link from Adam that puts my maggot story to shame. Not for the weak of stomach.

Next, I started a new job this week, at Yahoo! Personals. I'm also moving (still in SF, yes I'm a commuting fool), getting ready to leave for Maui for the marathon, and taking a class, so I'm a little, uh, nuts. I had to interview someone here today and I started talking backwards more than once.

But the job is fun. Super fun! Just . . . crazy. Personals is in 1998 start-up mode. What recession? Love and sex always sells, baby.

Ok, that's it for now. Back to the matchmaking biz.

Crazy! Busy! That's all I

Crazy! Busy! That's all I can say right now. Except I appear to be healing well and should be off to Maui next Friday. I was getting really, really worried that I wouldn't be able to make it. The magic of physical therapy. More later.

Today was my last day

Today was my last day working at Kaplan, and thus ends my tenure at the so-called evil empire. Actually, after two years there it's clear to me that they're not much different than TPR. At any rate, though I said this before let me say this again, with feeling: I hope I never, ever, ever work in test prep again! I mean, in terms of what you could be doing in this world, it ain't bad, and does actually help people. And it's allowed me to help lots of people -- teaching free classes, giving out free materials, helping friends. And the past two years offered me this strange opportunity to capitalize on all this otherwise worthless information I'd had stored in my head in an entirely new context. So, hey, it's all good.

Anyway, it hasn't really kicked in yet, and I wish I had a few days to relax, but I'll be in Maui in three weeks, and frankly I'm pretty grateful to be employed. In fact, today was strange in that I was leaving willingly and not laid off. My last job change was a layoff, and I survived at least 4 in almost two years at Kaplan, so I almost expected I'd be cut again. (Knock on wood that I'm not suddenly laid off at Yahoo! in two months.) Since I worked at my first dot-com in SF I've only been unemployed for 1.5 weeks, so I feel pretty damn lucky. I keep remembering the layoff at Desktop.com, where I didn't realize all my coworkers had been laid off as well. They were laughing as I walked past a group of them to my desk to get my stuff, and when they asked me what was up, I responded testily, "I don't know about you guys, but I just lost my job!" Hee hee hee. We all still giggle about that one.

So, I'm looking for another place to live, and amazingly SF landlords are still under the assumption they can screw people to the wall. Even my landlord is jacking the rent on my place $150 when I leave, and for those of you who've been here, you know that paying $1195 (in SF) for this cave is a joke. But I was here one night while she was showing the place, and people kept showing up! I noticed the only ones who didn't walk in and almost immediately leave were all SF newcomers. Man, always suckers somewhere.

OK, off to enjoy my weekend. Aloha!

mdc is a rockstar for

mdc is a rockstar for scoring free tickets to Morrissey next weekend. Woo-hoo! Last weekend during our drive through Napa our soundtrack included Louder Than Bombs. Nothing like getting in touch with your inner depressed fourteen-year-old self. I'm hoping Morrissey will be the best 45 minute concert I ever see. (O.K., this account pegs him at 80 minutes, so maybe he's improved over time.) Do I wear black eyeliner? Docs? Oh, fun!

Ok, can you all indulge

Ok, can you all indulge me in a "why the internet is so wonderful" story today? I'll keep it brief. The internet is wonderful because I just sold two pairs of old RayBan sunglasses that I bought around 1988 for $20 and $30, respectively. Even better, one of the pairs went to a gentleman in the UK. Hello! I just sold a pair of old sunglasses to some dude in Manchester! It's crazy.

Everyone give a nod to Leslie, who just launched her blog today. Go, Les, go!

I was so pleased to hear yesterday on NPR that the international community is not buying the Bush bullshit about Iraq. Not to say that we won't go ahead and bomb the hell out of them anyway and drag our allies along kicking and screaming, but thank ye gods that not every country in the Western world is run by a bunch of war-obsessed cowboys who need to strike one out for daddy. Christ.

Also, I guess I can go public finally -- on Monday I start a new job at Yahoo! personals! So, if you're looking for love, I'm your pimp, yo.

Deneb posted his Napa photos as well. And some fun post-party bar pics. As always, once you get Ms. Heller and Ms. Milway in on the action, fun photos ensue.

Mmmmmmm. Warm, long weekend. Yum!

Mmmmmmm. Warm, long weekend. Yum! First, I ran 18 miles on Saturday. All I have to say about that is that I've been using crutches on and off since. But no fear! I'll be running that damn marathon if, well, I have to keep using crutches afterward, which is a distinct possibility.

Sunday was spent wine tasting in Napa, where the temperature hit somewhere in the 105 degree range, which I find lovely. Unlike other places in California, 105 in Napa is awesome. Dull your brain with a little wine and the heat gently bakes your skin. You can feel yourself ripen like the languid grapes that surround you. It's the perfect place to stretch out on a picnic blanket in the shade and have someone feed you grapes and cheese. Which would have been great, except mdc had an even better idea and wrangled us a lunchtime table at Tra Vigne, where we feasted on a meal only second (in my opinion) to Chez Panisse Cafe. Mmmmmmmmm. Cheese pudding. Seared chili-rubbed ahi tuna from Hawaii. *drools*

And could Monday be any more perfect? I mean, damn, like 80 in SF. Dude! Jen and I went to Baker Beach for a few hours. Incredible. Then out to the Sunset for a BBQ at my friend Frank's. Wow. Screw Burning Man. I had fun. Check out a few pics below . . .